Shit.

Shit. Lately I've been going through a lot of it. I don't want to react any other way than I have though. I need to feel crappy, I need to remain hopeless for a while, I need to lament. I got f***ed over by a girl that I was holding out for. I was stupid. I should have known it was going to end this way. It always has. I think it always will. I'm the guy that always gets screwed over. I did everything right too. I gave her space, which she asked for. I don't know. It's just I have never experienced a situation where I have lost so much trust for a person. I started out trusting that it would work out, in a good way, not like this. Lesson learned: the faithful get f***ed and burned, discarded and forgotten. The nice get run over and pushed aside. The genuine unnoticed and under-appreciated. And in the end I will recover and then it will happen all over again. I've reached a new level of pessimism.